L.A. County Jail: ‘Now that’s hot’
Posted May 11, 2007

America’s privileged paparazzi princess was sentenced to 45 days in jail last Friday for violating her probation, namely driving on a suspended license. Paris Hilton has until June 5 to report to Century Regional Detention Center in Lynwood.

Reality has finally caught up with this glamour girl, and the rough cotton fabric of an orange L.A. County prison jumpsuit will soon be grazing her primped and polished skin.

Paris’ license was suspended last September for suspicion of driving under the influence. She has since been pulled over at least twice for driving with a suspended license and was merely given a warning.

Well, we at Campus Times feel that it’s about time that the reality show princess learns a thing or two about reality. “No one in Los Angeles is above the law,” said Los Angeles city attorney, Rocky Delgadillo. We agree – not even Paris Hilton.

During her testimony, Hilton told the judge, “I just sign what people tell me to sign.”

This socialite does not seem to understand what is going on in her own life. “I don’t know what happened,” she said after her sentencing. “I just did what they said.”

Maybe it’s time for Hilton to grow up and realize that “Clueless” was just a movie, not an acceptable explanation in court.

What will Hilton do for 45 days in an L.A. County jail? According to the Los Angeles Times, Hilton will not have the usual celebrity privilege of a “glamour slammer.” No, not this time.

Hilton will have to endure cold showers and inedible meals for almost two months. Without her signature pooch, her designer duds or her crystal embellished cell phone she may have a difficult time assimilating into her new environment.

Nevertheless, maybe the slammer is just what this clueless heiress needs – a stiff dose of everyday reality. You break the law; you go to jail – um, duh.

However, Hilton has that certain something that draws flashing cameras and fond admirers. Therefore, maybe she’ll experience this same popularity in jail.

Maybe they will love her party girl persona, and this may make her new “slammer status” the new “glamour status.” As with many things celebrity, this could be the biggest boost of PR magic on the planet. Everyone loves a scandal.

News of Hilton’s fate spread like wild fire throughout the news media, the Los Angeles Times even gave her front-page status in the Sunday California section. Despite the terrors of two months in jail, Hilton may have an opportunity to bank off her future jail-dome. Can anyone say B-rated movie?

You can just picture the movie deals and television shows banging down her door now, or what about a Paris tells all book deal – “My life, in jail”?

Wow, that will definitely be a best seller. If a book about her dog can spring off bookshelves, then her jail diaries will be explosive.

So, in conclusion, it’s really great to see Hilton get a reality check, but we all know what will happen after 45 horrifying days in jail – it will be back to the same glamorous and clueless lifestyle that she has become accustomed to but this time she will have a book deal, another B movie and of course a television show.

Hollywood knows how to handle scandals like this.

For Hilton, enduring jail will be quite damaging on her silky blonde hair and sun-kissed skin, but hopefully she learns a thing or two about life while she’s livin’ it up in a L.A. County slammer.

L.A. County Jail: ‘Now that’s hot’

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