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Adult resolutions fault to childish joys
Posted Feb. 15, 2008
Erin Konrad
Arts Editor

It’s only the beginning of February, and I’ve already completely failed at my New Year’s resolution. I don’t usually make one. I think, for the most part, it’s just a way for gyms to get more memberships and students to vow to study harder. But this year, I decided to make an effort. I optioned to try to take more steps toward ‘becoming an adult.’ Okay, technically, I’m 21; thus, I’m very much an adult. But inside the safe bubble of college, I am basically still living off my parents and avoiding any real way of earning an income.

So part one of my resolution: to make ‘adult’ decisions when eating. I vowed to eat healthier, consume more fruits and vegetables, and avoid eating something out of the vending machines everyday. Right when classes started, I was doomed.

Circle K was beckoning, I was starving, and a Pop-Tart just sounded good. I tried to reason that a true adult would listen to her body and eat what appealed to her. And then, the logical side of my brain switched on and argued that there is absolutely nothing in a Pop-Tart that even resembles something with nutritional value.

Part two of the 2008 makeover: be more responsible when it comes to schoolwork. This one seemed perfectly reasonable, when I’m a true adult with a true job, I will have no choice but to complete tasks on time.

But then my goal went out the window, when my concentration levels were dipping, and the TV came calling. Why did there have to be deliciously horrible auditions on “American Idol”? Did I really need to watch the “True Life” marathon for several hours? So, perhaps, when I become an adult, I will not have a TV in my home. Oh, who am I kidding? I’d rather be insulted on national television by Simon than miss Nancy Grace on CNN every night.

Next step: exercise more. I reasoned that adults wish to take care of themselves to prevent heart attacks and flabbiness and such. I’ll admit I hate exercise of any kind, but I thought it was worth a shot. Once again, being back on campus ruined my resolution right away.

After looking for parking for a half hour and feeling like the closest spot was located in nearby Nevada, I walked grudgingly to class. I should have realized that this walking could constitute as a slight amount of exercise. Instead, I was extremely bothered that I had to walk so far in the first place, and made a new vow to not break a sweat for the rest of the week if I could help it. Oh well.

Finally, my last adult goal: to save more money. Adults, in their responsible nature, save in order to feel financially secure.

This resolution I’m sad to reveal was broken almost before I even made it. I had to buy those adorable sunglasses from H&M, the sandals on sale at Kohl’s, the new must-read bestseller from Barnes and Noble, and some magazines at the supermarket.

I like to justify my expenditures by arguing that they really weren’t spendy purchases at all. But in reality, those tiny acquisitions add up.

So, since I’m having such trouble trying to be a grown-up, I’ve decided to just enjoy my extended adolescence for as long as I can. There will always be time later to get a career and a house. But for now, at least I can still enjoy my Pop-Tarts.

Erin Konrad, a junior journalism major, is arts editor of the Campus Times. She can be reached by e-mail at ekonrad@ulv.edu.